The Search for the Perfect Diet Food... or Not

Was watching a weird show while doing little things around the house this morning and stumbled across an interesting TV show on OWN...

My Strange Addiction is about some seriously unusual people.
The guy having a relationship with his car? Oh he is positively normal when compared to the guy with a life-size doll for a wife or the guy who eats glass.

Hold Up... I wonder what the Saturated fat and calorie count for glass is?

Does green glass taste different from blue or pink or yellow glass?
Does smokey glass actually have a smokey flavor?

Maybe this guy has stumbled upon a way to fill up without filling out?
I mean if you have a stomach full of glass I am pretty sure your digestive system is going to be too busy for you to feel hungry for food.

I wonder what kind of damage that does to your teeth... your dentist would love you for sure.

And so would the GI doc.
Can you imagine what glass shards in your esophagus and stomach would do to your insides?
Oh, but wait! There's more.
Mr. Glass-eater dude eats bullets too?
Never mind- I don't care how low the calories and fat content of glass are...
perforated intestines, infection and almost certain death are not worth it.

I mean, if I'm going to do something life threatening on purpose it's definitely going to have to be something that is a whole lot more fun... or tasty...
Like eating the world's largest Boston Cream donut.

I guess my quest for the perfect diet food does not stop at glass...
but will continue... with me reading the labels on everything before I eat it...
and searching The Food Network and The Cooking Channel for yummy low-fat recipes as I struggle to get to my weight loss goal...

or at least the next mini-goal... to weigh less than 200 pounds...
Which at 203 is within my grasp any day now!

That Has How Many Grams of Saturated Fat???

Would you believe that a cinnamon muffin has 9 grams of saturated fat?
And that isn't even all the fat ...
Yes, it has unsaturated fat too!

And that bowl of mac and cheese?
Would you believe it has 6 grams of saturated fat...
and I don't even think the cheese is real...
I mean what kind of cow do you get powdered cheese from anyway?

As you may have guessed by now I have been reading the food labels.
I will admit to not knowing what a lot of that crap is...
but I am reading them and have chosen a few things to really start paying attention to...

Things like the saturated fat content.
The carbohydrate content.
and the sugar content.

Saturated fat is the biggie since that is the one that I can say directly affects whether or not I will be able to leave the house at anytime, ever...

The carbs and the sugar...
well I have been watching them because they too are fat.
They just go by another name, like an alias.

"Would not carbs and sugar by any other name still leave you with love handles and cellulite"
That is the real question...
And the answer is, " Why, yes, yes they would!"

Because they are what is called ... 
...dun dun dun.. 
HIDDEN FAT


All those foods like licorice and chocolate syrup and fat-free cookies....
They are NOT fat free because they have exorbitant amounts of carbs or sugar or, in all the tasty treats at least, both.
And what happens to those carbs and sugar if you eat them and then proceed to NOT run on the treadmill for an hour or roller blade around the block 20 times...hmmmm?

All those carbs and sugars have to go somewhere and since they are supposed to be converted into simple forms for use as energy but the energy doesn't get used or there is too much to possibly have a need for...

It, like any excess energy, gets stored, like the extra energy being produced by the acreage of solar panels on the house around the corner...
 there is more square footage of solar panels on that roof than there is in the whole dang house... and only like 3 people live there and I mean really, how much energy could they possibly use to warrant all that solar panel space... you know they have got to be supplementing their income with the extra energy they are selling back to the power grid...
But I digress... but only because I have solar panel envy....and I really wish I could get rid of that GINORMOUS electric bill every month... and having the power company pay me sounds like a dream come true...
As I was saying, the excess energy-making-carbs and sugar are converted into a simple form for storage and that form is...
No, not solar energy, but wouldn't that be nice?
It is FAT...
That's right.
Carbs and Sugar are indeed just another name for FAT.

The fat is disguised as carbs and sugar and unfortunately when they lose their disguise they come out as cellulite and love handles and a jiggly butt... and not the good kind of Baby Got Back ...
If ya know what I mean...

So, the lesson learned this week is to:
1) read the labels on the food;
and 2) watch out for those undercover sabotage agents...
Formerly known as Carbohydrates and Sugar...

Because, yes, they ARE out to get you...
or at least the rear-end part of you.

Taaaa Daaaa !

Yesterday was Super Monday...

I know, like it's a real day or something, right?

Anyway, I should say that according to the sales people in the commercials on TV...

Yesterday was Super Monday...

As in the Monday after The Super Bowl...

Not because it was just a really, really great Monday.

But...

Actually...

It was! 

As you may, or may not have known, or cared to know, or even care not to know if you care or not...

I have been struggling to lose weight for some time, a few years, a little while now.

I also have had a few, some, a couple of health issues that have made it a bit more challenging to lose the extra tonnage I seem to have accumulated.

My most recent problem was the Gall Bladder thing.

It has been 6 weeks and I can now eat normal food...

and by normal I mean low-fat, low-sugar, low-flavor, low-chocolate, low-dairy, low-meat types of food...

some of it can even be in non-soup form...

without making me sick to my stomach or have to run to the bathroom in a giant hurry without warning.

Do not even ask about the Country Buffet fiasco!

So, this weekend being the Super Bowl weekend and having plans to attend a Super Bowl Party...

I was prepared to have to sit back and watch everyone else eating all the yummy food while I nibbled on a piece of Melba toast (or some other equally tasty tidbit).

Imagine my surprise, and delight, when HeMan Hubby asked me to go to dinner with him and a co-worker at another co-worker's home to celebrate the start of new jobs for him and the co-worker whose home is was not... because they both got let go from the Government contract they worked on with the person whose home it was and now they won't see each other all the time anymore... but it's a good thing, not the they won't see each other any more all the time part, but that they got new, and much better, jobs which is why they were celebrating...

And then HeMan Hubby informed me HE was doing the cooking.

His (in)Famous Chicken Cacciatore ... one of the 4 dishes that he can cook.

So, I gathered the ingredients needed and put them in a bag, told him to grab a bottle of wine and off we went.

He made the meal. 

We drank the wine ( I mean the person whose house it was and I... the guys had some... I think)

There were hors d'oeuvres - bacon wrapped scallops... and spicy nuts ( of the cashew and almond varieties)

and more wine... a lovely Seghesio Zinfadel... and something from 1996 and one from 2008 ...

Anyway...

I was starving so I ate a scallop... and the bacon it was wrapped in... and another, and another and... 

I had about 8 ...

And then dinner was ready.

Chicken Cacciatore, heavy on the garlic and onions... 

on a bed of arborio rice...

served with fresh steamed asparagus...

and more wine...

I had a little bit of chicken and rice and asparagus...

I had a lot, little bit of wine...

And then there was dessert! 

A delicious apple cobbler made by the hostess...

served with a dollop of vanilla ice cream...

I had a little apple cobbler and ice cream...

a lot, little bit of wine...

And then it was time to go home.

And I made it...

all the way home without getting sick... 

all the way to my bedroom and into my PJ's and onto the couch to watch a little TV before bed... 

before my tummy felt icky.

It was a record breaking evening!

I ate real food... 

And I did not get sick... well, at least not immediately... 

It was wonderful! 

It was terrific!

It made me want to go out and eat other things to see if I really could eat REAL food again...

And then it was Super Bowl Sunday.

And I went to a party.

Filled with good food, yummy food, deliciously wonderful food.

I ate a small bowl of chocolate chili... yes it really does have chocolate in it... and it is yummy.

So yummy in fact that I ate another small bowl of it.

And ham and swiss on a yeast roll with spicy brown mustard.

And 2 German Chocolate cookies.

And a piece of applesauce cake... or 2.

And I drank about 2 liters of diet soda and water.

And I made it all the way home and into my PJ's where I was relaxing in my very own room before my tummy rebelled... but then, I knew that it would... 

And then this morning... just as I was feeling icky and sluggish and bloated and just really not too good at all...

I stepped on the scale and...

TAAAA DAAAA!!!

I weighed in at 203.5 lbs...

Despite eating all the stuff that I really should not have eaten and feeling like I was retaining enough water to fill an ocean and really not feeling very good in general...

I did not gain any weight... not even an ounce! 

I also did not lose anything... 

But then again... maybe I did and all the bloating and feeling really yucky was hiding the loss...

But still... I did not gain anything and I ate real food!

Don't get me wrong... I was back to soup and crystal light today... 
and my seriously stomach thanks me...

but I feel like maybe, just maybe, there is a light at the end of the soup and other 'light' foods diet plan... 

that perhaps there is a chance that someday I will be able to eat a hot dog or a plate of lasgna or an ice cream cone or slice of cheesecake... 

But for now... 

that sliver of hope...

that tiny glimpse of a dream come true...

that TAAA DAAAA! moment I had this morning...

Is enough to get me through... 

a few more weeks at the very least.

I think.

I hope.

I can do this...

Yeah.

 I.

Can. 

Do. 

This.

2011... If I Remember Correctly...

Before you jump to any illusions that I thought of these questions myself... 

No.

I did not.

I got them from An Ordinary Housewife ( .blogspot.com) 

Who got them from The Bargain Babe at ZucchiniSummeretsy.blogspot.com...

I figured I would post them and my answers here on Color Me Thin so anyone who stumbles across this blog would get a better picture of who I am... besides a fluffy Mom in her mid-40's...

1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?

     Went on a cruise for HeMan Hubby's birthday with his Mom and TeenBoy,   

     Bratchild and SIX

       

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for

    next year?

    I can't recall actually making any resolutions, per se, but there were some things I

    was going to try to work on... and I did... try that is. 

    Actually I am still working on them so I guess that means they are the things I will 

    be working on this year too.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

     As a matter of fact... my oldest daughter, you know, GoodMom? She had a little

     boy the summer of 2011... BabyG is too cute! 

4. Did anyone close to you die?

     Yes...just before Christmas

  

5. What countries did you visit?

     Went to the Bahamas... via the afore mentioned cruise ship!

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?

     You mean in addition to Fame and Fortune? The body I had in 1986 would be

     nice... but really, just a happier, more satisfied family... and World Peace

7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

     Ummm, the date HeMan Hubby and I had on the cruise ship for his birthday... a

     night club filled with 20-somethings too drunk to walk and a casinio... a winning 

     combination! Oh- and the cruise date is the same date BabyG made his debut

     appearance so... that one is good for 2 reasons! 

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

     Can't say that I actually have any achievements, big or small, for 2011... 

     I guess I should work on that for 2012, huh?

9. What was your biggest failure?

    Hmmm, not finishing my novel ... actually not putting my novel or short stories or 

    outlines or any of my writing on thumbdrives or an external hard drive... lost it all 

     when the computer crashed... which, might I add, really sucks.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

      Why yes, yes I did. Thanks for asking....

11. What was the best thing you bought?

      I guess new tires don't count, do they?

12. Where did most of your money go?

      To Wawa... don't ask... oh, and the mortgages... and health insurance

13. What did you get really excited about?

     The cruise... the family reunion trip for my parent's 50th wedding anniversary...

     BratChild playing soccer in highschool

14. What song will always remind you of 2011?

       Rolling in the Deep by Adele

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:

– happier or sadder? yes

– thinner or fatter?  oooo, I know this one.... thinner!!!
– richer or poorer? you could say that... depending on the day of the month 

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?

      Seriously? Laughing. And Singing. And hanging out with all my children

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?

      Losing my temper... 

18. How did you spend Christmas?

     At home... for once! with HeMan Hubby and the kids.

19. What was your favorite TV program?

      Doctor Who... followed closely by the NCISes (isn't LL Kool J too gorgeous for

       words?)

20. What were your favorite books of the year?

      Read so many I can't remember them all but... The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

      series... started it in 2010 and finished it up in early spring 2011... loved those.

      And the Diane Mott something-or-other... love her murder mysteries revolving

      around a bakery/caterer... oh yeah, Davidson!

      told you I read a lot... well over 100 books in 2011... closer to 200 actually.

 

21. What was your favorite music from this year?

     Transiberian Orchestra... just love their Christmas music

22. What were your favorite films of the year?

      Harry Potter - The Final Edition... and I can't remember any others so... 

23. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

     2011--- that birthday was way back at the very beginning of 2011 so I can't

     recall much except that I :

    1) turned 45 

    2) it was a Tuesday

    3) I bought the cake instead of making it

    4) yeah, that's all I got

24. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more 

      satisfying?

     Honestly? 

     reaching my weight loss goal would have made a huge

     difference in my attitude... not just toward myself, but in my relationships

     with my family as well... I am working on that Big Time for 2012

25. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?

     Thrift Store Chic?

     Yoga Studio Savvy?

     Stay at Home Mom meets Diane Keaton?

     Somewhere in that is my fashion style... I know, clear as mud, right?

26. What kept you sane?

      I'm sorry. Did I give you the impression that I am?

27. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011.

     Spend less time worrying about Tomorrow and enjoy Today because 

     Today is really all you ever have.  ( yes, I thought that one up on my very own... 

     maybe I have a career writing greeting cards?)

Losing weight is... say what?

Losing weight is...

Easy...
Fun...
Exciting...

Or not.


But it could be, right?

Okay, maybe it's not really easy, but maybe it should be.
Maybe it isn't the losing weight that is hard, but the idea of losing weight that is hard to wrap your head around.
The thought of having to make time to exercise...
to have to cut out all the good foods that you love...
to have to pay attention to not just what you eat but how much and when...
But what if you could just eat what you wanted, when you wanted and not have to worry about it?

Would losing weight be easier?
Probably not.

But not because it wouldn't work...
but because if losing weight was that easy then where would the sense of accomplishment when you reach your goal weight come from?

And what about fun?
Unless you enjoy exercising, getting sweaty, feeling like your arms and legs are made of rubber...
it's probably not exactly going to be fun.
Actually, it's a whole lot like work...
but in a good way, a way that when you get to the end you have something that you can be proud of...

A thinner, healthier, sexier YOU!

And exciting... most dcefinitely not!

But isn't is exciting to see the changes you are making every time you look in the mirror?
Isn't it exciting to see the new you that is slowly emerging, like a butterfly from a cocoon in Spring?
Isn't being able to finally, finally! walk into any store and know that you can try on anything on the rack because... well, they have everything in your size!

And mostly, isn't it exciting to know that you have done something for yourself that you can be proud of, that your family can be proud of and that will

Hello... Is any body out there?

Major Tom to ground control...

Yeah, that's the same silence I have been getting for months now too.

Unfortunately I have been trying to talk to those nagging guys sitting on my shoulders...

Meet Good Idea, sitting on the right and...

you got it, Bad Idea sitting at the left.

Yes, I have been trying to carry on a sane conversation with these 2 parts of my self without any response for months...

should I exercise more Good Idea... <silence>

should I go see that bariatric specialist about that medical diet plan Bad Idea... <crickets chirping>

What the heck have I been waiting for???

That's the question I ask myself today as I review all of the options I have for weight loss and creating a healthy lifestyle that will lead to a healthy ME...

So, now that my horribly yucky gallbladder has been removed...

Oh thank you modern medicine ....

And I am able to start getting active and add a little bit more to my sadly limited diet...

(although Good Idea did speak up to remind that limiting my portion size and saturated fat content can only be a good thing)...

I have decided to chose the path not taken, or not taken in many years that is, and really hold myself accountable...

for the weight that I do or do not lose...

how healthy my attitude toward life and living is, or is not...

the way in which I approach the problems in my life...

And in so doing I hope to find a lighter, happier and more carefree me...

except for the carefree part... 

being the CEO of TheBusyFamily kinda negates that part...

But the rest, that is totally Do-able*....

definition: Do-able -something that can be accomplished that is actually worth the effort it will take

I think the World is Against me... or maybe it's just the scales

Yes, you read me correctly.
I think that the scales of the world are out to get me.
Or rather, out to not let me lose weight.

Semantics.

I walk.
I jog (okay I tried it one day and made it about 1 mile... sort of).
I do water aerobics...

In my backyard pool...

Where no one can see me if  I look like a beached whale...

Or a harbor seal fighting for it's life...

I eat right.
I exercise.
I drink tons of water and then I drink some more!

And yet, and still...

The scale will not move below 209.

It hates me.
And believe me...
The Feeling is quite mutual!

What Price Skinny?

Bulimia.                      (ewwwww)
Anorexia..                   (btdt)
Diet pills.                (too jumpy)
The liquid diet.            (ick)
The fat flushing diet. (too bad it comes right back)
The Cabbage diet.       (skinny but friendless?)
The Fish diet.    (skinny and a brainiac... not likely)
Thermogenics              (getting warmer)
Slim-fast.                     (getting hungrier)
HCG...  Say what?                                                                      

Seriously? 
Human Chorionic Growth Hormone...


HCG is now a weight loss product.




I mean it's a real one
.
Even Dr. Oz talked about it on his show.
He said it worked. 
He had no idea how or why, just that it had.


What is HCG? 
A hormone that is produced by pregnancy so the baby will grow. 


Who knew that un-pregnant people would lose weight if they took it? 
Who thought to try it?
On second thought, how do you get this hormone if you are not pregnant, or like, a boy?


Sometimes the leaps that scientific minds make to come up with solutions to the world's ills baffle and confuse me. 


And sometimes, I think that I'm better off just ignoring the world around me and moving to the beat of my very own drum, by myself, without any pregnant hormones to help me lose the weight...


What price is too much to pay for skinny-ness?


Anything that requires needles or patches or horse-pills, dehydrated foods or all liquid diets, prepackaged food that tastes like cardboard and costs as much as 2 weeks of family groceries...


Running, swimming, eating fresh fruits and vegetables, drinking a gallon of water a day... 


They may not be fancy.
They are not expensive.
They certainly aren't glamorous.
But they sure do work.... 


when I actually get around to doing them that is! 

I think, therefore, I AM...

not thinking about losing weight apparently.

Yes, I am back...
From out of town, that is.

Our family, the whole darn thing, went on a lovely joint vacation to Colonial Williamsburg.
There was great fun to be had by all... just not all together and at the same time.

We did a walking tour of the Colonial town... complete with a battle demonstration by re-enactors that was loud, smoky and quite entertaining as well as educational.
We walked around Busch Gardens for just over 12 hours...then went back and did it again for 8 more hours a few days later!
We went to Water Country USA... Yes, this is an amusement park filled with water slides and wave and wading pools. This translates into a day spent walking up and down hills to get to these fun and exciting slides followed by the climbing of quite literally THOUSANDS of steps to reach the launch just so that we could hurdle to our death at record breaking speeds from dizzying heights...
and then climb a thousand stairs to do it all again...
for over 7 hours!

Yes, I did all this walking.
I did all this stair climbing.
I drank a gallon of water a day.
I ate fresh fruit and vegetables.
I ate 3 meals a day and had virtually no snacks the entire week we were away.
I made healthy food choices on the few occasions we dined out.
I brought groceries from home and cooked healthy meals for the entire family nearly every night.

And yet...
I still am 210 pounds.
I seem unable to lose any more weight.

I am walking 3-4 days a week from 2 to 5 miles.
I am working out 2-3 days a week for 45 minutes or more to tone muscles and increase my endurance, my cardiac health and keep my Rheumatoid Arthritic joints and all-over fibromyalgia body pain to a dull ache.

And yet... still... shockingly and quite depressingly... I am still 210 pounds.

But...
I. Will. Not. Give. Up!
I. Will. Persevere.
I WILL SUCCEED!

or at least that is my intention...
and I am hoping that you will stick with me and encourage me and keep me honest and accountable for what I do, what I say, and what I eat...
Every single day...
Until my birthday in January or I lose 50 pounds...
Whichever comes first!